That Brady Thing


 Image Credit: CBS

At first blush, it seemed Tom Brady’s four game suspension would be upheld.

However, it appears as though Brady will not go so easily into the wife.

Tom Brady and the NFL Players Association filed a lawsuit against the NFL in federal court to lift the 4-game suspension, and are waiting the decision of Judge Richard Berman come September 4th.

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell wants to uphold the suspension, especially after it was discovered that Tom Brady had his phone destroyed.

The same phone that he refused to turn over, that contained over 10,000 texts.

What’s funny is, Brady didn’t even destroy the phone himself. His assistant destroyed it while Tom sipped his chamomile tea and drew pictures of frowns.

“The league has no hard evidence,” Kraft says. “I’ve come to the conclusion that this was never about doing what was right or just.”

Tom got serious about his stance and took to Facebook:

“We even contacted the phone company to see if there was any possible way we could retrieve any/all of the actual text messages from my old phone.”

Really, dude? You DESTROYED your phone.


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Well, actually, someone with a little more balls did, but had your phone destroyed and didn’t tell anyone about it for months.

So ugh, yeah. If I’m Tom Brady, I’d be thinking about how easy I may be really getting off here (and it’s not because I watch my wife get with the pool guy).

“To suggest that I destroyed a phone to avoid giving the NFL information it requested is completely wrong,” Brady said.

Notice how he says A phone – already distancing himself from it?

Yes, A phone was destroyed.

Brady’s agent, Don Yee, had to explain why Tom would do such an irreverent thing; like hurt an object that could very well be giving him testicular cancer.

Digesting how things unfolded, you come across a couple of interesting things..

First for Brady, it was withholding evidence. Then – destroying it. And the Patriots actually have the audacity to claim they’re innocent after that? I’m sorry, but Tom Brady is no Joe Pesci, and not everyone is so convinced.

The NFL already offered to reduce Brady’s suspension if he would just admit his wrongdoing, and he declined. Which I like, because maybe Brady shouldn’t get off so easy.

Brady should say no to two games less and say YES to Pete Rose introducing him as ‘the model citizen’ before throwing a deflated ball at his nutts. That’d be a good game of ball, dude.

“Tom Brady is a person with great integrity,” Robert Kraft says.
“Personally, this is very sad and disappointing.”

Like the Patriots not having a diamond asterisk on their championship ring(s)?

There’s a chance that Brady is innocent, and that the documents his party sent to the league that apparently contain those texts are all there, and inspected clean.

There’s also a chance that I’ll be able to levitate when I yoga.

The NFLPA is hellbent on changing the outcome here, and there are some legitimate questions that remain for some, like why NFL commissioner Roger Goodell didn’t interview Patriots official locker room attendant Jim McNally and equipment assistant John Jestremski about their involvement in the deflation(s)?

Well, the NFLPA explained that since both men denied any involvement in the deflation of footballs, there was, “no need to call them as witnesses.”

The NFL then concluded that “their testimony would have confirmed Brady’s involvement”.

Let’s say Goodell had called Jestremski and McNally, and they don’t snitch on Brady. Then, Goodell doesn’t really have a case. Goodell NOT calling them gave him more reason to uphold Brady’s four game suspension without having to rely on ‘ball science’.

There is truly some shadiness going on for both sides, however. Tom Brady being disciplined under the “Gameday operations manual” policy, which has never been made available to players, isn’t exactly fair – but interesting. That’s for sure.

Long story short: the NFL is getting Brady for conduct detrimental to the integrity of the game (AND – they called his kid fat).

The NFLPA thinks that the NFL can’t impose a suspension for these cheating violations.

Meanwhile, the NFL thinks that the NFLPA should STFU.

Goodell is apparently doing some things right, at least if you ask Hall-Of-Famer (former Raiders scout & executive) Ron Wolf: “Way to go on that Brady thing,” Wolf said to Goodell during his Hall Of Fame jacket presentation.

Goodell could barely contain his laughter.

Not all think Brady is guilty. Even some `political’ people have come out to defend him.

“I think it’s ridiculous the way they’ve treated him,” Donald Trump said. “He’s a friend of mine..”


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Well, that just makes everything Tom Brady may or may have not been involved in rather OK, doesn’t it?

September 4th is a big day. Judge Richard Berman will have made his decision whether or not to overturn Roger Goodell’s four game suspension for Brady. However, Article 46 of the NFL’s collective bargaining agreement gives Goodell the power to hear appeals, and unless the circumstances are so extreme, a federal court cannot intervene with Goodell’s decision.

In other words: Apple Sauce bitch.

Brady’s attorney Jeffrey Kessler submitted in court a list of 18 arbitration’s dating back to 1970 that have been overturned in the same court system hearing Brady’s lawsuit (Southern District of New York and Second Circuit). It’s cute, but it doesn’t mean it’ll give Judge Berman a big enough woody to bounce the ball in Brady’s favor.

Although reports have surfaced that the Judge is leaning towards exonerating Brady, not wanting to kneel to the Commissioner and all. Plus, to be one of the few Judges to overturn an arbitration in this court system while giving the NFL the finger in the process must seem rather satisfying.

Some questions remain unanswered.

If Brady is exonerated, what if more damning evidence comes out against him in the future? Does Judge Berman want to be the guy that got it wrong after initially being perceived as the guy that got it right?

What will actually happen to Tom Brady?

Will he be suspended four games? Will he just serve one game? Or none?

Who can he appease to clean the asterisk dust from his thumbs?

Who knows…just don’t do something stupid, NFL fans; like asking Tom Brady to hold your phone.

Excuse me – A phone.

I’d hate to get too touchy when talking about Tom Brady; a man being paid a King’s ransom to place his hands under another man’s sack to grab balls deflated to his liking.

Supposedly, at least.



– A.J. DeMello

TWITTER: @humorousfiend